Reading List

I never thought of myself as a book lover. Really. I always had so many friends who read with a disturbing voraciousness that I couldn't even compete with, and of course, being a competitive person (and balanced, I'd like to think) since I couldn't compete, I didn't try.

That's not to say I didn't read, I did. I read lots for school, hundreds and hundreds of pages, and while I'll confess, I skimmed more books than I should have (thus I never even knew there was a dragon in The Hobbit), I did read. So when it came to my free time books were pretty much off the to-do list and friends and art and whatever random obsession I had that week was on.

So I have to say I've really been incredibly surprised to realize post-graduation that I like to read.

I noticed it once in a while in college. I would pick reading Moby Dick over studying psychology any day.  Beowulf found way more space in my life than whatever else I probably should have been doing that semester, but even so, when we hit a weekend I did not pick up a book for fun. I did once, one finals week I got a youth fiction book, The Tale of Despereaux from the library and read it when my brain was bleeding from studying.

You'll understand my surprise with myself this summer as I've been consuming books like they're going out of style. I suppose it has to do with my having plenty of time and a general lack of intellectual stimulation. It's also back to that competitiveness though and I just want to start paging through those list of books I've always intended to read.

With that I thought I'd share some of the books I've been reading and a few thoughts, nothing complete, because that would feel like a 10th grade writing assignment and lets face it, I'd go on for miles, and you'd be better off spending your time on Anna Karenina like me (this week)

1) Age of Innocence - Edith Wharton
Phillip turned me on to this little gem. About a hundred pages in other than a few fabulous lines that I sat and re-read about 10 times, I didn't get his enthusiasm for the book. But by the end I was ready to add "everything by Edith Wharton" to my reading list. She's a master. She knows exactly how to frame a story, where to use symbolism, what to say and what not to stay. It's luscious. Reading to chew on.

2) Quitting Church - Julia Duin
This was a fascinating read. A religion writer for The Washington Times, Duin explores a trends in Christians leaving the church, not giving up faith, but abandoning the church. It's fairly anecdotal, but what she said sounded like fair assessments from what I've seen personally. Duin doesn't try and solve the problem, she does discusss what some people have found as solutions (namely, house churches and Orthodoxy actually came up quite a bit as well) but I think she points out a lot of flaws in the modern church without slipping in to lambasting. She has a fascinating chapter on singles. I appreciated her hesitation towards seeker-sensitive and growth/business based churches. Very interesting. If anyone picks it up and walks to talk about it...call me!

3) A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier - Ishmael
This one's an auto biography by a boy who lived in Sierra Leone. His Village was destroyed by Rebels in the 90s. He spent years running and scrounging just trying to stay alive while seeing absolutely tragic events. After running for years he ends up being recruited (if you can call it that) by the national army and fighting. His life in the army is essentially drugs, scouting and shooting. He is eventually taken for rehabilitation and ends up living in the US (don't worry, he gives that away page one). The writing is nothing amazing, though a few of his descriptions were fabulous. In general, this one will make you bleed a bit inside, but it's a fascinating glimpse into a life I never knew people had to live.

4) Love Medicine - Louise Erdrich
This one Marcella told me about when I was in Spain. In general, it follows families on an indian reservation. Erdrich reminds me in some ways of Edith Wharton's story telling, she knows when to not say something and she knows how to pull in allusions to make her stories have a weightyness to them. But it is sad. It honestly rivaled A Long Way Gone I think. The characters are very real and the problems are  too. There's a lot of sadness, but it was so well done. Because of the pathos I'm not sure I'd pick up another book of hers (there are plenty) at least not for a while, but I did really enjoy this novel.

5) Anne Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
I started this when I was about 13. My moral sensibilities couldn't believe someone would right a whole book about an affair and I dismissed it and returned it to the library. Apparently I think there's more to literature now than everyone acting out a perfect moral code. So far, I'm loving it. I'm reading the translation by Pevear and Volokhonsky, which I was thrilled to see our library had. I loved their renditions of Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment and Brothers Karamzov. Since I'm only 50 pages in I don't have a lot to say yet, except that I adore every character I've met in the book so far and I adore Russian literature enough to make me sometimes contemplate learning Russian and getting a masters in it. (But then who am I kidding, what haven't I contemplated getting a masters in?)


That's everything that comes to mind for the moment. I could put Hunchback of Notre Dame on their I suppose (Another pathos filled, fascinating book I'd love to discuss with anyone else who's read it) but I'm tired of typing.

While were on the topic, anyone have any recommendations? What have you been reading?

En Plein Air

I like publicizing my life. I have no idea why. Maybe I'm egotistical, maybe I just like thinking someone's reading, or maybe I just like comments. Of course it might just be that I like writing and it's fun to share my thoughts through some forum or another.

Whatever the reason, I'm back in the blog-o-sphere...we'll see how long it lasts.

It's strange how my last post was when I was living in Iowa looking for a job, because guess what! I am once again, in Iowa, looking for a job. It's like I'm living in Yeat's ever "widening gyre", but minus the blood and anarchy and all that.

I've applied for one dream job with RZIM as an "executive assistant," but it's been two weeks and I've heard nothing. At all. So, hope's waning.

Otherwise I've applied for gobs of things, mostly high school English teacher, teaching assistant, and marketing and publicity assistant for a publishing house, about 6-7 jobs in all. But so far everything has been full or silent.

This was depressing, but since my stay in Iowa is looking a bit longer than I originally thought, I decided to start enjoying what this little lake resort area has to offer.

This week, that was a plein air painting contest. It's been a bit nerve wracking, because I haven't painted since I left for Gabon in 2008. I got everything set up to paint when I came back, slowly finding things in boxes from Mom and Dad's move to Fort Dodge, IA. Then I realised I couldn't find my paints. I have no idea what I did with them, but it's hard to paint without paint. And then stuff happened and BAM I was suddenly in Abu Dhabi and did a bunch of crazy stuff, worked like it was going out of style and then decided to come home.

Of course, Mom and Dad had moved again, to Milford, IA. Which meant the digging through boxes was on again. The painting contest gave me a good reason to really find everything though and get going again.

Sunday I went and got a pile of canvases and canvas boards stamped for the contest (proof they were white at the start). Monday started day one for painting.

I went out on 71, to this little creek we drive past all the time on the way to Spencer (where Dad works, and where stuff is). I set up and painted all day.

Lots of people came by. I talked to a construction worker. Someone who wanted to take a picture and was back in Iowa visiting his grandmother. The guy who owned the land stopped and told me about his landscaping dreams for the area that he was glad he hadn't acted on since the flooding probably would've destroyed them all. He also suggested I go up on the hill I was painting and paint the scene from up there. Then an artist/art teacher stopped. I got a few pointers and he invited me to come by his studio sometime to chat or to do some lessons.

After talking to the artist I was depressed, because my painting suddenly looked worse, and he said he could show me some things to do the same painting in 2 hours....and I'd been working for 5. So I finished that one up and moved to another vantage point the artist had mentioned and did another. This one was done in 2 hours and it was much better.

Day 2

I drove around randomly. Headed towards...actually, I don't even remember. It was gloomy. I found a park and some water. But honestly, I was tired of green trees, green grass, greenish water, and graywhite skies.

As I left the park thinking about just going home, directly across from me was a quirky little antiques shop. It was red and green and crowded with flowers and knick-knacks around the front. I pulled in and asked the owner if I could paint her store. She gave me a weird look, and I stumbled around my brain trying to figure out how to explain that I wanted to make a painting and not actually paint the building. Eventually, we got it sorted out.

The owner was super sweet. She'd come over to see how it was doing and try and force soda on me after each customer left. The customer's were amusing. They would slowly pull in, looking over my shoulder, and then go in the shop. When they came back out, they'd all come over and look. People driving by, both days would honk. Which would make me jump out of my skin. It was nice of them to say "hi" though. I love painting, but quite frankly, it get's lonely. I don't like being on my own more than about 5 minutes.

Day 3

I headed over to a frame shop to get my first three paintings ready to hang. There was a bike shop right there and I needed to make an appointment to get my bike tuned up, so I stopped in there too. I was decided to stop back at the creek I painted on day 1 to see how things looked from up on the hill. I pulled off, wandered through grass as tall as me and was careful to steer clear of the bee hives. I took a lot of pictures. There were a ton of wild flowers on the hill and it was pretty. But getting my easel set up and managing to not fall down the hill all day sounded like a bit much for day 3. So I just took pictures. Then I walked across the road to take some photos of some cows for a painting later. The plan was to head over to Arnold's Park, a theme park from the '50s along one of the lakes and surrounded by little tourist shops, docks, and beaches. But my car decided to get stuck. Yup, my wheel dug in completely to the gravel while my poor little car teetered on the steep bank. Oh boy. Just then someone in a pick up truck drove by and slowed down.

Now I may be a city slicker, but I know that guys with pick up trucks who slow down when you're stuck are probably good luck. Sure enough, this poor guy crawled all around my car, got out his chains and pulled me out...and I almost rear ended him in return because I didn't realize he was done pulling me and my car was just cruising backwards into him. Despite my cluelessness and the guy's friend standing in front of me yelling to break (not sure why that didn't sink in) tragedy was bypassed. We all ended up free from dents (or massive hood re-arrangement) and I was free!

So I set off for Arnold's Park, walked around. More photos. Found some pretty docks, set up and painted for a few hours. It turned out pretty well. No one really talked to me. A few 20 second conversations, but the lack of conversation made it feel longer. The painting went fast though and I had time to swing by the frame shop and pick up my finished works along with a frame for the one I just finished.

Tomorrow I just have to put today's picture in it's frame and then turn them all in to the Gallery. There will be an opening show tomorrow with all the artists and the judging. It should be really neat. I don't think my are that great, but they got me painting again and I'm excited about the artist contact and the chance to improve some things. It will be neat to meet the other artist's and see their works. I'm just hoping there will be a nice little gradient of quality and that they aren't all professional level artists and then me. Either way though, it was fun stuff!

I'll let you know how the opening goes soon!

What do you want to be when you grow up?

I can answer that! Employed!

I think I'm giving myself an ulcer stressing out about finding a job.

As it turns out there's very little in Fort Dodge (surprise!...or not) and it's hard to find something anywhere else because I need enough to pay for rent then and my loans and I'd probably have to get a car. Actually I can do most of that (except the car) as long as I don't eat.

But I still haven't found much to apply to anywhere. It would help if I had a better idea of what I was trying to do, but at least I'm open I guess.

In the past few months I have decided (and mostly undecided later) that I should become a teacher, a nurse, a physical therapist, a psychologist, a nanny, an infant care specialist (baby nanny) a designer, an artist, or a writer. But a lot of those require quite a bit more school (but I think I'd like to pay off some of my loans before I get more, besides which I can't really get a loan anymore without an income of some sort) or they require luck/talent.

I was feeling hopeful about a pharmacy technician job that I interviewed for here. But I haven't heard anything at all, and the manager really seemed to be trying to convince me that I didn't want the job. I think he wants someone who looks more stable.

So since none of that is quite working out I sit at home and I read and I write and I spend hours looking for jobs and then I fill out applications and write cover letters and I try to think of a way to go to move to Europe.

On the bright side it's nice to see Mom and Dad, and I actually like the dog now. He's beyond bizarre, but he likes me and he's soft, so it works out.

I like getting to read too. I haven't just read for fun in such a long time. Ever since I graduated I think I like reading a lot more.

Oh! I have another bit of potential good news. I applied for a job at a dress shop today for a consultant. It's part time (only every other weekend). But the owner implied that she might need more help than that. She's not sure that she'll need anyone this month, but maybe next month. All I know so far about what I would do is taking measurements. But it sounds good to me, I think it would be a lot of fun to help people pick out wedding dresses and prom dresses and bridesmaid dresses. It might not turn out though. So far everything has pretty much started out promising and then failed. Hopefully something will work out eventually!

Never mind

So nevermind that last post.

I was thinking I was going to be a nanny/governess since I went to school for three months for it. But at this point, that's looking rather unlikely really.

So here I am again!

I'm "home" in Iowa. I would say with my parents, but they're actually flying here or driving. I'm a little confused on their schedule.

At anyrate, dad had an eye conference in California and mom went with him.

So all weekend it's been me and the dog. And what a weekend it was. It really wasn't all that exciting.

I was rather certain that someone would break in and kill us both, but thankfully, I was wrong. Yay.

I did learn that Pico can fall asleep while sitting up, and I learned how to drive to the library. I almost found starbucks too, but it was hidden inside Target, and I wasn't aware of that till after I got home and looked it up again.

I found some books at the library, including Freddy and Fredericka by Mark Helprin. I read a trilogy he wrote for youth while at Nanny school because it was illustrated by Chris Van Allsburg on whom I was writing a report. They were pretty good. Helprin would come to Hillsdale and teach creative writing classes and do lectures and things. I never actually made it to them, which I always regretted, but the connection through Hillsdale made me interested in his books.

Freddy and Frederika is quite good so far. It seems to defy description so far other than being a very long book (550 pages) with very ridiculous situations involving the fictional prince and princess of Wales. It's been quite funny so far, but it wasn't really what I expected after the Swan Lake trilogy I read or what I would have thought it would be considering the Hillsdale connection.

I've been knitting too. It's a lot of fun, but I mostly rip it all out and start over because of tinsy little mistakes. Actually it's rather exasperating. I don't know where the mistakes come from and I'm so very careful, and the more careful I am the further I get before some mistake sprouts out of the middle somewhere and I have no idea how to fix it or go back without ripping it all out and starting over.

But here comes the wonders of a library---I looked up knitting on the library catalog and found a book all about how to fix knitting mistakes without ripping them out. The only foreseeable problem I'm facing right now is I don't know how the mistake came about so I'm not sure what fix to use. But with any luck I'll figure that all out and avoid knitting the same project for the rest of my life.

Lately I've decided that maybe I have a problem with follow through. I have about twelve-hundred books started (well probably more like 50) and three times that amount of crafts and at least 4 instruments that I've been intending to learn for the past 10 years or so. Maybe this is just part of being human, but it's really bothering me. The problem is, everything takes a long time, and I think as a modern human I want everything to be done as fast as I think of doing it. As soon as I think it would be nice to read Anna Karenina I want it finished after a nice half an hour of reading. And when it's not I move on to the next book on the list anyway. And it's the same with everything else. When I pick up my mandolin I want to be proficient and when I'm not I get annoyed because I have no idea how to get there and so I put it away and listen to Chris Thile instead.

Because of this I'm bent on learning some things well. I'm not sure what they are. I'm going to finish my knitting project. I know that one. And I want to learn how to play the mandolin, piano, and guitar. But I think that might being biting off a bit much, which means mandolin will probably win because it's mine and it's portable. And I want to finish a lot of books, both ones that I have and haven't yet started. Which means that I think generally I'm going to have to find a way to be more efficient with my free time so that I can accomplish all this.

I've found that lists help me a lot. I love crossing things off lists. I have to break everything down so that I get to cross of things often otherwise I get annoyed and give up, but I think it's a start.

Speaking of which, I need to go transfer laundry and fold the dry stuff...which is on my list :-)

Jessica

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