Tears and Trust

Monday night I ate dinner at the Thelander's. They had invited over a visiting general surgery resident and his wife and two little boys who are all here for a month.

The older little boy (he's 3) really hit it off with Luke and was having a great time playing with him. However, he and his brother (1) are young so they had to go back to go to bed about 7:30. And the poor kid was distraught at this idea, to the point where it was almost comical.

When it came out that it was time to go home he started crying. His mom tried to reassure him that he would be able to come over and play again to which he responded, "No we won't! No we won't! I just know we won't!"

At the time this struck me as a totally bizzare response. The adults tried to reason with him that he is staying here for a month and they right next door. They even tried telling him what day he would come over, but for several minutes it was all no use as he just kept up his mantra, convinced that he'd been brought to have the time of his life only so that it could be torn away from him forever.

He eventually quieted down and they went home.

Today he and his brother were back at the Thelander's having a great time dying easter eggs and decorating giant sugar cookies shaped like eggs. It was probably an even better time than on Monday!

It struck me the other night that I am so frequently just like that little boy.

God gives me something good but once it starts to come to a close I start crying and getting angry and challenging him since I'm certain now it's going to be worse. Surely the whole experience was just a way for him to whet my appetite and then leave me with a consuming hunger for more and nothing to feast on.

But just like this little boy had loving parents who only have his best in mind (since if he did stay and play all night he would've been miserable) I have a loving God who knows that sometimes I need to step back and sometimes I need to go somewhere else for the night. Not to deprive me, but so that he can give me something even better later.

I think it's just as bewildering for this little kid to be told he has to leave as it is for any other person to get hard news or to face any kind of change. Afterall, it seems so much easier to just stay in one place. Keeping with the status quo can be a pretty easy. Familiar is comfortable, but sometimes you really have to just look up at God, hold back the tears and say, "Ok, I trust you on this one. I know you love me and it will turn out great." Then you let him take your hand and lead you on to whatever he's got planned next.